(yuummy)

irritated about myself.. xx

seriously

i messed up again.

its been a long time <:

the last days/ weeks or even the last month was pretty good. awesome, nice.

i got to spend a lot of fun time together with some friends included the person i like.

or at least i think/thought i like. for 3 years now. but as i started to get close to him i started doubting it. i mean i still liked to be at his side and i do like him.. but i think my heart reacted more when i was with another person. but thinking about being more than friends with him is like impossible.

nevertheless yesterday in the beginning i was close to my former or still crush but in the end with the other one.

today it seems like i've messed up. seriously. we didnt say a word. one time i thought that he told me sth and i answered but afterwards i think it wasnt directed to me.

kind of depressing. we planned to do sth today and tomorrow and i was really looking forward to it,

but i'm not sure anymore //:

it's my fault