not yet.

pretty huh? this photo was taken in oxford <:

i tried but i know the me now cant be like that. 

cant be so pure and kind like her. 

but even if i cant be like that yet, 

one day i'll hope that i'll be able to.


today i came to learn a lot things, i actually know but never didnt much attention to.
first. if you present sth. you've got to present it full of yourself to be able to convince the listeners.
if you always say "i think", or "i guess" it doesnt sound that you're sure, so your listeners won't be truly convinced from the thingsy ou said and think that maybe it's true or maybe not.
the second thing is that people who have a lower voice tend to appear more confident and trustfull in their words. people who have a higher voice tend to seem unsure and more likeable to lie.

so notice for me: pay more attention to those points! c:

♥

yesterday before i fell asleep i thought that a sincere hug would be nice.

and in my dream i dreamt about a person i know from school. he was so kind and friendly to me. we came to know each other better and we kind of fell in love. now that i write it here like this it sounds weird because it is a person i know, but i had such a warm feeling. i felt so safe and sound with him. my heart was racing. ah it was awesome <:

^ _____ ^

pretty huh ? c:

arrived yesterday from my school trip and it was a w e s o m e !

i did not want to return actually but at the last day i got sick so it was ok.

but during the days before i hold a strict diet and almost everything was good! sometimes i felt a little, little bit ill, but it felt so good, to live a week without my problems. i think things will turn out better from now on about my illness.

i got to know three persons and i came to really like them. especially one. she is like an angel. really pretty on the outside and maybe even prettier on the inside. so pure! that people like that even exist! really impressed.

i hope i can become like her. <:

i did not buy a lot which i think is ok but i lost something at the airport or the airplane.. it was something like a souvenir coint, pretty and a memento... sad that i've lost it .. but i cant change it. :c

some of the things i bought, i think, i will upload the following days but here are some pictures i took during the trip! in total i took 540 pictures those 5 days. a lot of precious memories for me!! c:

 balloons of pizza hut suddenöy flew away.

snapshot!

worried /:

when i was still allowed to eat strawberries /:

i will go to abroad for a week with my class but i am really, really worried about my sickness. i am holding a strict diet but i still have big problems with my digestion. i do not know what to do or eat else...

i will be praying that it will get better there.. otherwise i think this study trip will not be a lot of fun /: .. but the opposite.

for the study trip itself i am really looking forward to .. but i am so afraid that i will get sick. /: it is really no fun and it is not like i have only stomach aches .. that really would not be a problem at all! i would even prefer really strong injuries instead of this problems i have..

please pray with me as well :c

DD':

just finished watching a show .. it was so sad. really just cried a lot. so touching.

this may sound awkward and weird but it really teached me a lot about life.

kkk

went there with some friends <:

should appreciate more. keep fighting!